More on Melanthe

Have I mentioned how much I love Melanthe's heartlessness? Here are some quotes I adore, showcasing her detachment when men try to court her (it's revealed very early in the story that she'll be assassinated if she accepts marriage or attention from any man, for reasons that are complicated to explain here):

She began to encourage him, though he needed no encouragement from her to lead himself to his own humiliation. She was angry at him, but smiled. She regretted him, but she smiled still, ruthless, laughing at his wit, complimenting his banquet.

I love her. She's flawed and complex. And she's paranoid that everyone talks about her. Here's a quote from the beginning of the story, when she's sitting at a banquet with the gyrfalcon she brings with her everywhere, sure that everyone is gossiping about her behind her back:

There-- that woman in the blue houpelande, leaning back to speak to the next table-- she was no doubt complaining to her neighbor that such a gyrfalcon as Princess Melanthe carried was too great for a woman to fly. Nothing in the duke's mews could match it; not even the Black Prince himself owned such a bird. The insolence, that she would display it so at the duke's own feast! Immodesty! Wicked vanity and arrogance!

Melanthe gave the woman a long dispassionate stare and had the pleasure of watching her victim turn white with dismay at the attention.

It's that last line that really cinches it for me. Melanthe is so sure of her own imagined scenario of what the woman in the blue houpeland is saying, that she cuts her with a cold glance, but moreover, she enjoys watching the woman squirm! I love Melanthe. She's everything awesome and real and wonderful to me.

One of my favorite lines of hers is simply this:

Since she felt the urge to smile, she followed the primary rule of her existence and did not do it.

Melanthe. Alegretto. I love these character.

Imagine a girl, trusting and unprepared for the vices thrust upon her in a cruel world. Who would she become? How would she survive? The Princess Melanthe is one of the coldest romance novel heroines I've ever read, and an eternal favorite. She's not sweet, though the story hints that once she was. I love that by the end of the story she still isn't sweet, though bits of softness come through here and there when she feels safe. Ultimately, she's learned that showing vulnerability leads to an opening for people to hurt her, and has become calculating in the extreme. 

Ruck is the hero, but Melanthe and her closest friend, Alegretto, are what make For My Lady's Heart by Laura Kinsale one of my all-time favorite books.

Alegretto is androgynous. Feline. Elegant. Clever. A ruthless killer. He's cunning, charming and utterly devoted to himself and oddly, to Melanthe. They are similar creatures, so perhaps this shouldn't be odd, but for someone so completely selfish, I suppose I always wondered what made him crave Melanthe's acceptance and attention. Loneliness, maybe. The recognition of another damaged soul.

I still haven't read Alegretto's novel-- mainly out of fear. He is so completely perfect to me, I almost don't want to see him in his own story. I'm afraid his essence won't be the same.

The Boy, Part 1: Water's Edge

I smiled at the boy.

He smiled back.

"Come into the water," he said.

I shook my head. I never went into the water. I didn't trust it. Gentle waves that soothed, deceptively warm. But water could destroy. The simplest way to keep from drowning was to never get wet.

"Please?" he asked, tilting his head to the side. He took my hand. 

The contact made my heart beat faster. I glanced at the shimmering, still surface of the water. No. It looked calm and inviting, but it was dangerous. The tide could turn. It might become cold. Harsh. I inched away. My entire life I had kept safely out of the water. I would be a fool to go into it now.

"You can trust me. I'll keep you safe." The boy sat and pulled me down beside him. "We don't have to go into the water if you don't want to. We can just sit together and look at how beautiful it is. And once enough time passes, you'll see that I'll never let anything bad happen to you. There's nothing to fear. Then you'll want to go into the water with me."

I sat with him, watching the water, watching him, listening to his stories and telling my own. I hadn't noticed the subtle rise of the lulling tide, the calm water inching ever closer to our spot. A hushed wave rolled up and reached our legs. I started, tucking my feet up.

"It's okay," the boy said. "I'm right here. We're together."

The next wave brought water swirling around us. It was so warm. Surprisingly comforting, and the boy urged me further in. I trusted him. I could trust him. The knowledge filled a deep ache inside me and I wanted to go deeper, to feel the water surround me and fill me. I wanted what the boy wanted. I let myself go, into the water. I let myself go.

But we'd gone so far from the shore. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't feel the safe, sandy ocean floor beneath me anymore. I could feel nothing but the boy and the water.

"You seem afraid." The boy's eyes were gentle. "What are you afraid of?"

I shouldn't have told him. I should have smiled and said, Nothing. I'm afraid of nothing. But I said, "That the tide will turn. That the water will become cold. That you'll leave me alone."

"I'm right here, just as much in the water as you are." His lips came close to mine. "You have nothing to fear."

His words soothed me. Yes, the water was just as deep for him. He understood. 

"There's an island." He held me close. "It's beautiful. Come with me?"

(Continued in The Boy, Part 2: Island).

Disney Movies and Chocolate Milk O'Clock

I can't sleep!!!

What else is new?

*sigh* I guess I'll go make myself some chocolate milk and watch a Disney movie. Somehow I'm going to convince three-in-the-morning to be my friend.

Souls and Flowers

Impossible fragility

Astonishing strength

Easy to ignore, to forget, to stroll past
without noticing

without remembering

Easy to love

Tempting to crush

Just Like Heaven by Julia Quinn: Sleep-Deprived Ramblings

I've been up since 2am and I can't sleep, but at least I'm almost finished with Just Like Heaven by Julia Quinn. It's a fun read, and just the kind of story I love from JQ-- light and sweet-- though it's a little on the lighter side than normal. Not tons of depth, but a cute historical, which is what I was in the mood for. If you've read JQ before you might recognize the Smythe-Smith girls, who I've always wanted her to write stories about. Marcus and Honoria are adorable together, and even though it won't make my favorite list or anything, I'd recommend it if you're already a JQ fan. If you're new to Julia Quinn's writing I suggest starting with the Bridgerton series.

I think Just Like Heaven starts a four book series? I'm not sure. It's almost 5:30 in the morning and I'm notorious for getting the facts mixed up even on a full-night's sleep!

Stuff I do when I can't sleep

I can't sleep. When that happens, I usually read or write. Sometimes I draw, but I'm not a great artist, nor do I aspire to be one. I draw for fun. I also write for fun, but I do aspire to be a great writer someday. I'm not saying I will be a great writer- I don't have a crystal ball or anything. I'm just saying that it's what I'm working towards.

Lately though, I've been goofing off on the internet at night more than reading, writing, or anything else. So I figured, why not start yet another a blog? And this is why I'm posting this. Because I can't sleep and I'm on the internet anyway. Great reason, right?